Jumpkick to Freedom

In a singularly retarded line of reasoning, BP CEO Tony Hayward said yesterday that

“The Gulf of Mexico is a very big ocean. The amount of volume of oil and dispersant we are putting into it is tiny in relation to the total water volume.”

Now, let’s forget for a moment that the Gulf of Mexico is not, in fact, an ocean.  (It is a gulf.)  He’s basically saying that the Gulf Coast oil spill is relatively “tiny” compared to a “very big ocean.”   True, turning the Gulf of Mexico into, say, 50% oil would probably be worse, but that sort of misses the point.  The current spill doesn’t really qualify as a minor nuisance.

If we placed his statement amongst the Most Misguided Comparisons in History, I think the list would look like this:

5)   “That volcanic ash cloud is relatively tiny compared to all of Europe’s air space”

4)   “The Herpes virus is relatively tiny compared to a very big crotch”

3)   “The Gulf Coast oil spill is relatively tiny compared to a very big ocean”

2)   “That iceberg seems relatively tiny compared to the largest ocean liner ever built”

1)   “The wall of liquid hot magma pouring down the hillside is relatively tiny compared to the very big city of Pompeii”