Dear Pre-Cog from Minority Report:
Please stop trying to sell me a Palm Pre. You frighten me with your translucent skin and your acid flashback stories and your piercing demon eyes.
“The other day… I was walking in the park… after lunch. When I saw this a juggler. She was very good. And the weird thing was, the more balls she had up in the error, the easier she made it look. It was a feeling I knew, like Deja Vu.”
You are not only creepy, you are a liar. I know this is for several reasons. First, you were not walking in the park. Your skin tone suggests that you haven’t been outdoors in nearly a decade. Nor did this take place after lunch. Unless by ‘lunch’ you meant when you’re intravenously fed a solution of nutrients and sedatives.
Please do not come back on my television screen. I only purchase phones from flesh-and-blood people who can prove their humanity by stealing other people’s livers.
Sincerely,
Dan
